Lil

her hands lie bony
as chicken's feet

her eyes distant
cataract dimmed

her laughter thin
in the long afternoons

she watches sparrows
from her window seat

her days flow like
coffee with cream

unstirred and calm
near to the cup bottom

laced with oxygen tubes
and blue inhalers

that become more real
than her name

the news

photo by n.m.rai

mind fogged
words like sludge
on the brain stem
the news drips
a poisoned faucet
upon the page
carnage abounds
why do we read

we animate
our fears
dress the facts
in the tatters
of our nightmares
then turn to flee
but there is
nowhere to go

dragonfly

caught on a branch tip
out beyond the allotted daylight
he is helpless in the heavy air
intoxicated by the play
of a dying light
the quick fade of leaf edges
the tumbling down of vision
as eyes go night blind
by the scent of lemons
ripening on trees
the epiphanies of moments
that brush eternity

evening

shivers slide across
the surface of evening

small cries of some animal
hidden in the color green

the feel of moist earth
of body dampness

the hidden folds where
scent speaks our names

the intimacy of dreams
where we create words

and bless them
with our own desires

tell me again how I live
inside your mind

how I dance for you
across the pages of your night

one leaf

we walk on pebbles
to climb mountains

small and hesitant
in the moment

we are one leaf
on the mustard tree

one dust mote
falling

with limited vision and
fear like sand in our eyes

we can only touch
what is here

step ahead unseeing
with thoughts in our heads

of what a mountain is
or where the road goes

like children in a game
of blind man's bluff

Too Close

The nightmare
sat on my head again

last night
the one that repeats

and visits
as if invited

without a name
like those odd sounds

outside the window
that tell of the bodies

of small animals
that move in the dark

the odd crashes
and thumps I cannot name

or the screams of a rabbit
in an owl's talons

always at 3 a.m.
and too close

I can do nothing
am merely a spectator

in night terrors
the owl already fled

and I run lost
looking for an exit

arriving again
at a dead end

and it's too late
to turn around

drawing

my hand follows the mind
and the brush

as if it understood or
was not sleepwalking

on the page
on the bellies of birds

kinship

I am sore this morning
tethered to a body

to this less than imagined
music of bones and skin

that betrays me
that swallows sunlight

in its dark insides
its catacombs

too small to hold
poetry and delight

that binds
imagination and flight

to roped muscles
and pressed nerves

till I feel a kinship
with stones

and tree bark
and soft bodied frogs

and newborn fish
caught in swells

everything bruised
and alive

trying not to swallow
its soul

Giraffes

Giraffes have invaded my mind,
oddities superimposed
on an odd pavement.

Cantered thoughts ping off words
creating walls out of
the reverberations of air.

Long purple tongues explore
the meanings in leaves and
write dictionaries on taste buds.

Of course, there is silence,
only the wail of eyes
that speak with an inner light.

I am growing spots
and my feet are thickening.

The plasticity of souls
speaks of all things.
Matter is only temporary form.

sound meditation @ 5:30 am

the thrum of the hive
a computer fan whirring
in silent air

an open window
the single elongated note
of distant trucks passing

mouse clicks
like finger hiccups
that follow the mind

the clock ticks
its programmed reality
left on automatic

the weight of thoughts
rolls like jellybeans
across the floor

the dream calls
of a sleeping bird
splinter the air

and always the specter
of the coming day
the intruder at the gates

Shards

The day is detonated in-utero.
I hold its shards in my hands
as if reading tea leaves of desire.
The Buddha was right.
I painted the day in my mind
before it arrived and
its dream walls tumble
from the simplicity of what is.
I am left bleeding in the dawn
with ragged breaths.

Dark Rain

The pre-dawn rain
with its dark voice
speaks of the sun
as a mirage
remembered from dreams
some childhood fantasy
of light and flowers.

Water floods the moment
with an aural massage
that whispers of sleep
a white-noise that blocks
all other sound
as if I were living
in the veins of the universe
immersed in the rush of time
in a pre-natal sensation
of night and pulse.

I am seduced into silence.

Dancing

I shake hands with myself
on the surface of old photos.

I am introduced again
to faded memories
that litter the edges
of my present.

There have been deaths
along the way to here.
Signs of a slow martrydom

meltdowns and shifts

of sensation into nowhere.

We are ghosts moving
in the shadows of ourselves
dancing in dawn light.

haze

photo: Brian Fitzgerald


feet bare
flexing on kelp
the curl of waves
over whispers of foam

I am awake
I am arisen like the mist
a haze of your reality

smiles dimple
the sand
anticipation blends
with birdsong

market

photo: n.m.rai


like plump mangos
still traced with green

we are all plucked
into the moment
with perishable skins

the center of bliss

Sparrows

pen strokes

no breath as in
spider silk against skin
drops of meaning
dried by the moon

no ground under the feet
as if dream wavering
into daylight

still the silence
thoughts trampled
by work-boots

old music in the air
unheard
like unwashed dishes

like a wingless fly
perched on a rose
filled with pollen

Otters

There’s a dark silence without
insect song or the rush of rain
that gnaws at the mind.

I birthed from dreams prematurely
pursued by an unknown, a malevolence
dripped from a reptile's tongue.

Otters run free down dirt paths
on the other side of words.
My mouth puckers with fur envy.

Shreddings

Dragons roam the walls.
Creaks in the night
sound under cricket voices.
Scratchings run along skin.

I wake to torn dreams,
these shreddings of my mind
that litter the landscape like tastes
lingering along tongue edges.

I step again onto a ground that
only feels solid, where I can’t fly
and people don’t evaporate
yet tremors rattle the dishes.

Light spray paints my eyes.
The paper tells of herb tinctures.
I boil your name in morning air
and drink you with coffee and cream.